The Wandering Salesman

F*#K!

The F word. See it’s just a word. One you probably hear every day. And it has universal appeal and a plethora of uses. For instance;

1. F*#k that guys funny.

2. That Michael McIntyre, he’s a funny f*#ker.

3. Well, that flight was f*#ked.

4. The airline lost my f*#king bags. F*#kers!

5. F*#king hell, this car goes. Especially for a rental.

6. Or, this rental car is well and truly f*#ked.

If you don’t like the F word, then you may as well not read The Wandering Salesman. I’m tired of all the political correctness on the web. Especially on all the travel forums, travel sites and everything in between.

Because, sometime life is f*#ked. Especially when you travel. As soon as you walk through those doors to the airport, you essentially lose control of your life until you get to where you’re going. That’s why so many people freak out. Or lose it. Or if you’re like me, wave your arms a lot and use the “Do You Know Who I am?” speech.

By the way, that rarely works.

My wife and children simply walk away from me at this point. Wife whispers gently into the ear of our offspring, “it’s ok kids, Dad’s lost it again…”

Sometimes I even call my kids f*#kers. Much to my wife’s displeasure. I try not to do it when they’re within earshot. But it sometimes slips. Because lets face it, if you have 2 kids under 10 and you’ve dragged them all over the world like I have, then trust me, they will be little turds on at least one flight. Guaranteed.

This blog is dedicated to the people who travel for a living. The one’s trudging through the airport, not looking simply tired or worn out. Or disheveled. But well and truly rooted.

Hopefully some of the stories will resonate with you and put a smile on your face.